North Korea, Best Korea!
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
How do I recover from singing "your body is a wonderland" on his voicemail?
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
We knew we were dealing with a pro when some random guy at the bar thew you over his shoulder and you still didn't spill your drink
Strangely enough, that's not the first time that's happened
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.