The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
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