yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
Randomize
