There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
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doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
New guy at the liquor store was inexplicably fascinated by our huge jug of williams. First he said what are you gonna mix THAT with? and looked confused when I said air.
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
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