"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
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