the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
Randomize
