That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
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