is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
And if you put this on Facebook, I will drop live cockroaches in your mouth while you sleep and then smother you with a pillow.
You always say the most romantic things
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
Randomize
