so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Randomize
