i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
Fuck. I did it again. I plugged in my toaster and walked away thinking it needed to preheat. I am dumb.
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
