i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
My mom just drunk texted me complaining about her genitals smelling like Taco Bell. I really am her son
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
