you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
Randomize
