Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
I ran out of diet so I'm mixing captain with a juice box. Being a mom has finally paid off.
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
Randomize
