What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
she looked like the before picture.
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
I want to play lord of the rings tonight. And by that I mean get really drunk, potentially lost, and go trekking through the woods or climbing shit. I want all of you there. You are the fellowship. This is a mass text. I am insanely high.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
Randomize
