too bad you live with your parents still
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
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