my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
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