You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
