If Billy Mays did an infomercial on your dick, it still wouldn't get you laid.
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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