Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
No I am not eating basil off your cock
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
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