In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
Randomize
