I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
Why the fuck was there a shirtless Mexican in my apartment this morning?
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
Randomize
