Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Randomize
