i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
Randomize
