I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize
