Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
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