if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
You handed J your Mayan-pocalypse shopping list and told him he wasn't getting laid unless he brought everything on it. Where is he supposed to get a live goat?!
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
Randomize
