I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
Randomize
