If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
Well, he's moving. Now my only options are to accept it or fake a pregnancy; and since you are my only pregnant friend I'm going to need you to pee on this stick for me.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
Randomize
