Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
Randomize
