Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
Randomize
