We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
birth control should be required to get into college
21 Porn Stars Confess What Sex Is Really Like On Set
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
19 People That Found Pubes In All The Wrong Places
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!