Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
Randomize
