Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
Randomize
