1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize
