I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Randomize
