I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
I look excited, but its just a facade.
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