I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
Randomize
