Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Went to an open-bar law school party and puked in front of Justice Scalia. My legal career is now complete -- I literally got judged by a U.S. Supreme Court Justice. Can't get any higher than that.
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
The fact that you're allowing Santa to dry hump your ass is sort of a dealbreaker
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
Randomize