Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
Life lesson: Don't give a drunk girl a dutch oven after having taco bell. She puked all over my pillow. Funny as hell though.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
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