Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
I'm sure nobody at Walmart was wondering why I was wearing a glittery tutu and needed $300 changed into small bills
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
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