Tim hortons said i dont meet their criteria. What the fuck criteria is that? You put bagels in an oven.
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
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