so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
No I am not eating basil off your cock
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Randomize
