WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
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