God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
My vagina is very pro this idea
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