I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
