Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
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