Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
Jumped in the kebab van and said he was Ultimate MasterChef. Incurred wrath of six angry Turks. I got free chips.
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
