Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
Randomize
