Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
So here's a brief summary of my weekend: last night I drank four glasses of Death Punch, grabbed the toaster, said "This is mine", put it in my pants and walked out the front door.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize