Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
Why is there no Netflix category for "I just wanna cry, but I don't have time for a whole romcom"?
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
Randomize
