lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
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