So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
when are you leaving homes?
it's 7:51. why the fuck are you awake at 7:51
I had a sex dream about Oprah.
go back to sleep
dude. it was a sex dream. about. Oprah.
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
Randomize
